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Stiff.

Mom: What's wrong with your neck?
Me:Mom, please. Ive told you this morning. But you don't even notice -_-
Mom: You want me to massage?
Me: Silent. *Actually I was thinking how it would be so damn hell. Because, is masseur will do that or it's just my Mom that's is so strong?*
Mom: Okay *then my Mom directly did it like I just said yes-_-*
a moment ... then I scream loudly till all over the world could hear me
Me: Ok Ok Stop this. Please, I can't stand
Then I get up to avoid her, because my Mom was like... 
doesnt act like she wants to stop. Yet. Even tighter-_-
Then my Mom said: That's what you want. But, notice it will last about weeks. 
Dang! Kill me now
A week like this? It's not holiday. At all.
It's a way goes to hell.
Ohmigod, what's worse than this?
I mean, when I have to just looking left-right or back side
I must do like rotating my body all over.
Can't you imagine? Like my neck doesnt have any joint or sumthing
My neck feels so darn stiff and unmovable.
Because when I move left-right-behind even just a bit, It torture me.
Ohya! You know what makes me like this?
Blame my project of physic!
As I'm the editor,
and our deadline is over so I need to hurry this project.
Ghani? He delayed do this task, and so despiteful
Doni? He... doesnt even care -_- 
So I found myself got those all over. Err.
Is that fair? I work on it almost entire of the project.
But nevermind, You both lucky because now, I guess I learn something.
What I learn from this project instead of physic... is like I hold the bag :"
Well, when you're in the group, you need to be tolerant.
But, notice that, people in the team must be understanding too.
I mean, that's a lesson of life man. You can't be selfish.
well, I'm a bit dissapointed in the beggining,
let's say they took their role -_-
I don't count it.
But, I'm proud to show my editing to Mr. Bakti Sumoko Aji.
This is a worth lesson, sometimes, people forget it huh?
But well, Hope this is worth :)

process

For me,
It feels sorest
I dont know exactly 
what you guys are thinking, 
when facing your giant
I mean those probes are definitely must be occurred in your life
It's a way from God to make us to be better
I know we are not prohibited to feel sad
But, I just want to tell
that you must be grateful
What we are talking about now is you are ready or not
So, when something happen to you
Don't ask why this is happening...
It's a dead loss
But, How can we pass it
No one can deny, facing that probes are beyond our control
I mean, it's closely impossible for someone to know 
what they exactly feel if they're in hard prob
And, just right now, I'm feeling this
Haha Idk exactly what I'm gonna feeling 
when that moving on must becoming to let go phase
Well, you know sometimes we have moved on...
but not let go
I don't find any words best describe my feeling to him
But, it feels different
can't be easily to be gone, replaced, even forgotten
I'm trying my best, but there's not pretty much good move
You see how I'm trying, Well yes, it hurts
But, you know what?
I hurts the most when she/he don't even care
When you're trying to forget all,
he did it without even trying
Let's say I'm stupid.
I've been thinking bout it pretty much.
I've never been this way before, but then I believe
All feelings I gave devoutly has been counted by God.
It's not about shame on whoever
It's about what do you really feel.
I'm grateful feel this pain,
I'm grateful to have been realized
I'm grateful cause God give me something 
to admire yet that feeling worth.
I know, a day on tomorrow, whenever it is
I will hurt by him
cause If he doesn't hurt me,
I will not move on and even less let go
The question is,
Am I ready or not. Like I said...
It's beyond my control
just let it be :"
So, let's say in other words
I give up, give my heart to be hurt but I believe I will the better one :)

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